<Pederastic Dumbass> Thanks
<Pederastic Dumbass> from a show on BBC called Coupling
<Pederastic Dumbass> http://www.bbc.co.uk/comedy/coupling/quotes/index.shtml
<Pederastic Dumbass> Some great quotes there
<me> that's the english version of Friends, right?
<Pederastic Dumbass> Even better
<me> or rather that's where we got friends from
<Pederastic Dumbass> I really thought I’d gone to his house, you know, to heal our spiritual divide. But it turns out I was just gagging for a shag. Those two are so similar.
<me> lol
<Pederastic Dumbass> YOu barely see Chandler kissing
<Pederastic Dumbass> Europeans kiss all the time
<Pederastic Dumbass> and talk sex
<Pederastic Dumbass> MUCH better

(Silence, for about 1-2 minutes)

<Pederastic Dumbass> Guess not chatting
<Pederastic Dumbass> Pleasant dreams!

(OK, this pisses me off because he thought that him throwing out the fact that Europeans are SO much more open about sex than we are was actually an interesting conversation started)

<me> lol
<me> well, i'm not getting much to go on
<me> i guess i could strike up a convo about how the europeans are more open about sex
<me> but that's blase
<Pederastic Dumbass> Or you could ask questions about me
<Pederastic Dumbass> Conversations tend to be 2-sided things

(Obviously he is SO damned interesting that I should bombard him with questions)

<me> true, so why am I asking you all the questions? (i.e. carrying it )
<Pederastic Dumbass> I am the one doing the work
<Pederastic Dumbass> but if all you want to do is argue, I am sure there are others interested in that
<Pederastic Dumbass> I'm not though
<me> lol you're touchy

(Because obviously, he was.)

<Pederastic Dumbass> Not at all
<Pederastic Dumbass> You're insulting
<Pederastic Dumbass> I wrote a profile stating I've lived on 4 continents

(I hadn't looked at his profile, but the fact that he says this in this manner will prove itself to be the problem.)

<me> really? how did i insult you?
<Pederastic Dumbass> I mention TV shows
<Pederastic Dumbass> I mention speaking 6 languages

(OH! You speak 6 Languages?! How fucking impressive! And you've been to 4 continents! OMG I want you and I want you now!!!)

<Pederastic Dumbass> and yet you state I am boring
<Pederastic Dumbass> well, I guess I'll leave you to the more exciting people then
<me> well, you never mentioned your six langauges
<Pederastic Dumbass> maybe you willdazzle them withyour scintillating conversation skills
<Pederastic Dumbass> I put it in my profile
<Pederastic Dumbass> so I don;t have to cut & paste every time

(OK, the fact that he feels the need to cut and paste a statement like 'i know 6 languages!' shows a slight laziness on his part.)

<me> and i said the conversation about europeans being open about sex would be 'blase'
<me> which isn't so much boring as 'tired and done with'
<Pederastic Dumbass> Aside from your arrogance right now, I don''t see much you are adding to a conversation
<me> again, i fail to see 'arrogance'

<Pederastic Dumbass> couldn't ask about languages

(And about speaking languages He Who is of Six Tongues!!)

<Pederastic Dumbass> couldn't start a conversation
<Pederastic Dumbass> you could only throw attitude
<Pederastic Dumbass> You have a lot to learn

(Naturally, this pissed me off...)

<me> les langues? qu'est-ce que je dois demander aux langues?
<Pederastic Dumbass> Yeah, like writing in French will impress me?
<Pederastic Dumbass> Learn to converse first
<Pederastic Dumbass> then try to show off

(Translation: Oh, damn, you won't find the fact that I 'speak' 6 languages impressive. As a note from a polyglot, if you claim to 'speak' 6 languages, you are probably fluent in only 2 of those MAYBE.)

<me> was will ich dir fragen?
<Pederastic Dumbass> you try to show off -- failing miserably -- and then try to be nice
<Pederastic Dumbass> wrong order
<Pederastic Dumbass> try again

(We will learn later that Mr. 'Polygloy' Dumbfuck doesn't even know German. I got the word order right. Verb in second position, subject, indirect object, infinitive. Bitch.)

<me> actually, that was the rich order
<me> right, that is
<Pederastic Dumbass> This is not up for discussion, competition, or argument

(You are CORRECT sir! You are wrong, I am right, and you are a dumbfuck.)

<Pederastic Dumbass> be nice or go away

(Note that he is the one who continuously messaging me. If he really didn't want to talk, he'd use the ignore button. I decide to 'try' and strike up a conversation with him. i.e. play along with his ego.)

<me> ok, so which langagues do you speak?
<Pederastic Dumbass> English, French, Hungarian, Japanese, Portuguese

(Oh, he of 6 5 Languages!)

<me> and the sixth?
<Pederastic Dumbass> Well, I used to do Spanish
<Pederastic Dumbass> but I don't anymore
<Pederastic Dumbass> so don't say 6 anymore
<Pederastic Dumbass> I learned then by living there
<Pederastic Dumbass> there being America, France, Japan, Brazil, etc

(What is the most banal thing I could ask.....?)

<me> so why did you travel so much?
<Pederastic Dumbass> Work
<Pederastic Dumbass> first as an ESL teacher, then when into computers
<Pederastic Dumbass> just lucky

(Silence, 3 minutes)

<Pederastic Dumbass> ok then
<Pederastic Dumbass> conversation went away

(Oh, I'm sorry. I didn't know we were having a 'conversation' about YOU and YOUR travels and about how fucking special YOU are....)

<me> well
<me> i asked questions
<me> i was expecting, maybe, some questions towards me
<Pederastic Dumbass> OK, and do you know any other languages?
<me> i know 6
<Pederastic Dumbass> I realize you have no opinion or comment on my living abroad or occupation

(Yes, I don't, why the FUCK should I?? Once again, you think it makes you fucking special??)

<me> English, french, german, latin, greek

(I'm aware that this is 5. Note that I correct myself, and that I did not make a huge deal over my languages. I NEVER do. I only offer this information if asked, and do not use it to impress people.)

<Pederastic Dumbass> and that's why you said nothing

(The talking 6 5 language speaker actually exercises critical thinking!)

<me> well, make that 5
<Pederastic Dumbass> Latin is spoken?

(Dumbass)

<me> Well, 'speak' it. I study it
<me> along with Greek
<Pederastic Dumbass> Greek is spoken last time I asked an Athenian

(Fucking, fucking dumbass)

<me> Classical Greek isn't
<Pederastic Dumbass> but you didn't say classical...

(Gee, I put it next to LATIN, and since you know oh-so-many languages, I thought you could intuit that.)

<Pederastic Dumbass> So have you traveled?
<me> I've lived in London and Germany before

(Silence for 1-2 minutes)

<Pederastic Dumbass> ....
<Pederastic Dumbass> You want to throw any adjectives in that sentence? Explain or do I have to play 20 questions?

(OK, so I'm supposed to pump you for information about your Oh-so-fucking-interesting life, and yet YOU get to sit back while I tell you EVERYTHING about my life??)

<me> London is where my family is and my father was stationed in Germany.
<Pederastic Dumbass> Good night

(Was it something I said?)

So let's review here:  If you are a 33 year old, and you message people in their early twenties expecting them to be impressed over your 'world travels', don't expect to be greeted by a googley eyed anamoured little boy who will faun over you because you are oh-so-learned and oh-so-well-traveled.